Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
