Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
