This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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