He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Randomize
