the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
