we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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