Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
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