He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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