I wannas sexs uuuuu
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
