are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Randomize
