There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
