ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
