Where is the hickey?
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Randomize
