part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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