guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
