I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
