Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I think I sprained my soul last night
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Randomize