I feel like abortions should bother me more
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
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