I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Randomize