Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
