it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize