So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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