have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
