Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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