CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize
