We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
