You're so nebulous sometimes
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Randomize
