i don't like sucking hair
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Randomize