Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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