Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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