you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
