Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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