I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Randomize
