She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
The power of my boobs compel you
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
