Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
