i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Randomize
