I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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