If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Randomize
