i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize
