D3 body, D1 cock
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I showed him my bush... on skype.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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