You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
