i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
