Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
they need to just BURY HIM!
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize
