i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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