I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Terrible idea I love it
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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