Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
