i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
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