she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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