matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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