I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
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