I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
